Tuesday, July 5, 2011

Today I Cried.......

Ok, I didn't cry full blown tears but the more I sat on the bench in my bathroom the more my eyes filled with tears and the more red they got. But, I had to snap back to reality. Pull it together, you are about to go to work and.......... You are about to drop your son off at his new daycare!!! (insert snotty nose here) That's right, Malachi started his new "school" today. I thought I would take him to work with me this week because we are only there 3 days but I knew there was just no way I could. Especially coming off of vacation, knowing all the phone calls I would be dealing with. So, I swallowed the lump in my throat and started getting his bag together.

Getting his bag together was the easy part. Dismissing the thoughts in my head is a different story. What if no one plays with him? What if he doesn't eat enough? What if there not very comforting? blah blah blah It's finally time to leave. We get in the car and these thoughts come back and my eyes try to fill with tears again but I am not going to let that happen. Nope. I'm tough. I got this. You know that feeling, when you really just wanna let a big ole baby cry but don't want anyone to see you so you hold it back? Only then you get the feeling in your stomach, like your stomach is crying. Well, that's what I had. That feeling. And I didn't want him to see me cry because I didn't want him to think it was something bad and already have a bad perspective of his new "school."

We arrive. There it is, staring me right in the face. The place I'm about to leave my baby for the first time. (insert sweaty armpits and hot face here) We take him to his room and Nick distracts him with the play kitchen. He immediately starts playing. I'm trying to talk to the teacher and not cry. She's very reassuring that he'll have a good time. (Lady, I use to work in daycares, I know the make mom feel better speech). Btw.....Ms. Jessica and Ms. Shelby are both very nice. She told us that we could call anytime or come by and see how he was doing so that did take a little anxiety off my heart. We left.

I wanted so bad to run back in there and hug and kiss him and see what he was doing but I didn't. I knew it would not be good for either of us. Boy did this first day back to work go by slow. I didn't have my phone, the internet on my computer was down, and my baby was with strangers!!! The time just couldn't go by fast enough. When it finally came time to go pick him up I felt like we drove so slow. We finally made it. I tried not to run in. I mean, I didn't want to look like a dork or anything. I got to the door and when he saw me, he had the biggest smile on his face. He came running to me saying, mommy mommy. I picked him up. He squeezed me so tight and kissed my cheek, said mommy in the sweetest voice then hugged me so tight again. That was better than winning the lottery. Then what did he say, "Ryan's not nice." I'm thinking great. He already has had a run in with a bully. You better just watch out RYAN, this momma is on to you. ;)

They said he did good. There were a couple of times that he would ask for us then get sad and they would comfort him and he would be fine. He didn't want to eat his lunch like he normally does with new people. So Ms. Shelby had to feed him. lol He went potty all day long. PTL!!!! No accidents for the new people. And....he did good taking a nap on his mat. All in all, he probably had a much better day than mommy did with his first day of school. :)


  1. This made me cry...how in the WORLD am I going to be sble to drop my son off at daycare next month????????

  2. Can I cry now?! No really, so proud of him!!! (and you!! Way to go momma! You did it!) he's such a big boy. I knew he would do GREAT! :) Ryan better straighten up and leave that baby boy alone or Kinnley might come beat him up. You don't mess with one of her boys! ;) seriously, so glad he had a great first day! But I'm glad I didn't read this while I was at home. I don't think I could handle it. ;) I'm gonna go cry now........

    Play date asap!! :)

  3. So sad! I am already torn up about leaving Crosby.