Thursday, August 25, 2011

A week ago today.......

One week ago today our lives changed again. Nicholas Lawson Cowan was born on August 18 at 12:49pm. He weighed 8lbs 7oz and was 21in long. He was and is absolutely perfect. His delivery was much like Malachi's. FAST! Dr. broke my water at 12:08pm, I started pushing at 12:40pm and Lawson arrived at 12:49. That is the part that is the a lot like Malachi's delivery. What wasn't like Malachi's......THE PAIN! Malachi-felt nothing. Absolutely Nothing. With Lawson, epidural working great. All the sudden, not working so hot so the doc came in and gave me a bigger dose. Ahhhh...relief. Wait, 15 minutes later, pain like nobody's business. Dr. Morehead had told me if I felt the urge to push or felt like I needed to poop then it would be time to push. Well I didn't have this feeling with Malachi so I didn't know what to expect. Back up a bit...the nurse started turning me from side to side (she was not gentle like the other nurses) and I was getting pretty upset. I was in pain and she was annoying me. Finally, my sweet husband just simply said, she doesn't want to be touched right now. The nurse proceeds to say, I need to turn her because the baby's heart rate has dropped. What?? Why didn't you just tell us that?? I would have been much more receptive to her touching me. All of the sudden, I felt like I was going to poop (tmi I know) my insides out. I kept asking Nick if I had pooped and he kept reassuring me I hadn't. This must be the feeling the dr. was talking about. The nurses all came in to prep, the dr. came, I pushed 4 times and here was our sweet sweet blessing. And that's the story of Lawson coming in to the world.

He's a wonderful baby. And his big brother has done exceptionally well, much better than I think we thought he would. Malachi loves kissing on Lawson. He does it at least 20 times a day. He likes to hold him but not for long. He's a good helper too. From the time Lawson was born we could already tell a personality difference between him and Malachi. Malachi at birth-laid there and let the nurses do whatever, hardly cried, was very laid back. Lawson at birth-fought the nurses the whole time, cried and cried, and wanted what he wanted when he wanted it. It's fun to see how they are different and how they are a like. It's going to be interesting to see how these patterns continue. Lawson is a great sleeper. Awesome sleeper to be exact. Too good of a sleeper right now. We have been having to feed him every two hours because when I took him to the dr. on Tuesday he only weighed 7lbs 11oz. So prayerfully, he will have gained weight so we can get back on a 4 hour (at least) eating schedule. It's hard feeding him every 2 hours because he sleeps so well.

Just like with Malachi, Nick is an awesome dad. He is so patient and loving and most of all, he's the best supporter. He just recently started a new teaching job so he wasn't able to stay home with me the first week this time. Even though my mom and dad were here, it still wasn't the same without him. I need him. I want him around. It just seems I am more comfortable and can get through things with him. Nick if your reading this, I love you more than words can say and I am so thankful that you are in our lives.

As I know to well with Malachi, Lawson is gonna grow up too fast. It's hard to believe he's already 1 week old. I'm excited to see the things my boys do, watch them grow, and see them become the men of God that I know he wants them to be. I'm ready for the brotherly fights, the I've got your back bro, and the bond that will be between them and their dad. And well, we all know boys love their mommas. ;)

Monday, August 1, 2011

No Matter What The Day May Bring To You........

SN: Please excuse the way my blog is viewing, I can't fix it!!! Maybe time for a new one.
For the past couple of months, Malachi has had a new favorite song.

No matter what the day may bring to you, Keep praising God.

Whether up or down, whether good or bad, Keep your praise always.

Fred Hammond

Wouldn't it be nice if we could just take these words and apply them?? I will be the first to admit that this is not what happens when trials come my way, but it is a place that I would like to get too. Too many times we (I) get caught up in the smallest things of the day that don't amount to anything and we (I) stay fixated on that one circumstance and it will ruin our (my) entire day.

I love to hear Malachi sing this song. I love to hear him sing any song. He's a good reminder that I need to just keep praisin' God. We were in Cedar Hill the other day and something happened. I can't even recall why I was upset or anything. What I do remember? In the midst of my complaining, out of the blue, Malachi shouts out....No matter what the day may bring to you, Keep praising God. It's amazing how God can/will use anybody no matter their age to send you a message.

It's like yesterday in church, I did not feel like standing up during worship. I was tired, I'm ready to have this baby, I was hurting.......see a pattern of complaining? Then I looked over at Malachi (he likes to be in big church for worship) and he is just singing his little heart out. He didn't know any of the songs but he was still singing and God knew what he was singing. He would raise a hand here and there and clap and sing. I was once again reminded, it's not about me, it's about Jesus. The tender heart of a child praisin' the Lord does something to an ungrateful heart. He took my heart and flipped it. Like everything else, he was watching me. He put his little arm around my neck and patted me and gave me that little smile. It was like God was using him to ease my mind, take away my pain, and saying to me, Suck it Up! You can't praise me for 20 minutes but I gave up my life for you. Ok God. I hear ya. Loud and clear.

Although I know it's hard, especially when the news isn't what we were expecting, but I'm challenging myself and you to just keep praisin' God. It may take us a lifetime to fully grasp the concept, but all He's asking is for is for us to try our best. We will still make mistakes, we will still get discouraged, we will lose sight at times, but Praise the Lord, His grace and Mercy is new every morning.

No matter what the circumstance

I know my life is in his hands

The storms may come but not for long

My praise will keep me moving on.

Now if I'm really honest I really gotta say

That I get somewhat discouraged when trials come my way.


No matter...............

Fred Hammond